Dawning of the Days

Today is a day that will not be forgotten. It is one of those days when your given a blessing and a curse. It is one of those days that you look for each piece of the jigsaw puzzle that is your life, or adventure with an individual. I reflect upon my predicament with a sense of foreboding these are difficult and delicate times.I first saw him in the Inn of London, he was standing there gaunt and cocky. His broken slang heard clearly as he was mocking someone. I should have known that he was nothing but trouble, but that was the day that started my downfall. His spiky dark black loxes and his green eyes, peered at me while he jeered at someone that in comparison was unremarkable. He was looking as flashy as ever, ofcourse he didn't notice me in any remarkable way. I was shyer but like a fish I was hooked.I saw him a few times after and paying attention, and noticing an advertisement bearing his name. His name Zillah Grey, it strikes loathing to some and fear to many but to me and I suspect the female admires he manages to acquire, a thrill. I decided to approach him, again in the London Inn. He was leery and suspicious as I suspect I would be if the situations were reversed. He begun to tutor me on ins and outs of proper vampire and witch slaying. The order to which one slays, and of some of their vulgar habits or their stupidity. He speaks as if teaching these things are a greater purpose that he is sharing. Eventually I became to know about him, appreciate his quirks. He became my lover, my teacher and eventually my love. Our love is not what you read in those trashy romance manuscripts that the Sultan would discourage. His heart is held, and maybe never will truly be open to me. He has said he loved me, but he has said a lot of things...that prove not true. Maybe had he not had the mother he had, nor the tragic life on the streets and definitely not the habits. But then would he have time traveled, would his slang have caught my attention?I had thought we were safe in our predicament, I knew he had a lady love, a Miss Lime. Though he strayed from her with multiple women, he told me this himself. But I loved him, I needed him. Plus I had the reason/excuse to see him, that he was to tutor me. I did want to learn about vampires and witches, and more importantly about Zillah. The strangest things started to happen, I was sick when we traveled, moody and tender. I had thought that it was the virus, a virus that is what I told myself.......I eventually sought out Dr. Billyboy who is in question to if he is the Sire of me. He informed me of the "happy" news and how "lucky" I was. I was lucky? I was mortified. How could Zillah do this to me? but then......there was this new life in me. I tried to hide it from Zillah it was hard too, cuz I was getting sick all the time and acting weird. Zillah thought I was fooling around, scrumping he called it. He seems to think about Ramaku who is a flirt and didn't like him very much. I informed Zil, I wasn't. However he eventually figured it out with his friskiness. My bulge, damnit my body had betrayed me. Thus sort of became the trying times of our relationship. Zillah wanted me kept around near him, for him but not to be officially his. He was worried about my safety from the gypsy known as Lime and her hexes. He was worried for me and the babe (who had first he questioned if it was his, accused me of all sorts of improper things and called me horrid names). Well then what happen was of course Lime appears and gets upset and Zil ran off, leaving me. I was very upset at that moment, thought perhaps I would lose the poor child. But I met a really great friend Retsu, she talked with me and explained how you need to have more tolerance for difficult men. Zillah is difficult to say the very least. He came to the place I had hidden, and he talked to me, we had devised a plan to be deceptive for the sake of the baby. After much convincing, and at the time I was determined to keep it. We arrive in London, and coincidentally enough in London Inn. There appears Lime, she was a very pretty gypsy girl who weaved her reality spinning ways and I was in Bengal. I thought this rather odd, one day I was snuggling with Zillah then gone. Well I had made my way back, and be damned if she did not try again, course this time I was prepared. Then she did the same to Zillah. She wanted the truth, she was not casting hoaxes or hexes. She wanted the truth, Zillah was dodging and hedging and being shifty. Well eventually I spilled out the truth. Then like a possessed creature the beautiful gypsy girl committed suicide.I felt horrid, I should have lied..........No words or nice kind deed can replace that. Zillah was furious at first, then calm......then acted like he didn't need or love her. I hurt him........I really did with my stupidity, I just thought truth solves all, didn't it? All I wanted was everything to be open, no secrets. But Zil was right...........oh so right, he sent me away and then brought me back. He gave me an ultimatum, stay away from Ramaku, listen to his wisdom and don't go places which I don't know anything about. (I think it was the truth thing).I have no idea of what he feels toward me, or if he just keeps me around for the child I carry. I hope he does love me.......My heart is going to be bruised over and over by him, but I love him. That is my lot , this is my gem and my burden.